Monthly Archives: April 2017

Ways to Practice Mindfulness

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Introducing the practice of mindfulness into your life can be accomplished in several ways. One of the most convenient ways to embrace mindfulness is to take advantage of all the little opportunities that present themselves each day. By chipping away a little at a time, you can comfortably grow into your mindfulness practice. Consider these ideas:

 

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Stress Tips for Moms and Single Moms

Stress for Single Mothers can be very harmful to your body, mind, and spirit

The Stress

Being a mother will likely be one of the most difficult things you have ever done, but on the other hand, it will be one of the most rewarding jobs of your life. As a mother, you often forget to take care of yourself because you’re caught up in the madness that is life. It doesn’t matter if you’re a stay at home mom or you work outside the home, being a mother is stressful! Luckily, there are some great strategies to help you deal with mom stress.

Stress Tips For Every Mother

Get the kids on a schedule. The best thing that every mother can do for herself is to get her kids on a schedule and keep them on it. When you try to stick to a routine you’ll feel more comfortable handling breakfasts, lunches, naps, and bed times. When you don’t have a schedule, you may begin to feel scattered or disorganized and your stress levels will increase exponentially! Things are always unpredictable when kids are involved, but when you have even the simplest structure, your days will be a little more predictable and you’ll save your sanity!
Don’t be afraid to put yourself in time out. Many mothers feel like they just have to keep pushing forward when they are about to come unglued. Moms get stressed and often need to take a breather, just like kids! Instead of continuing to push forward when you are about to snap, walk into another room and just breathe deeply for a few minutes. While you are breathing, picture how you would like to respond to the situation and then remind yourself that it is important for you to follow through in a calm manner. After all, you’re a role model for your children. A minute or two in “time out” can make for a great day for the whole family!
Eat Healthy.
If you ask 100 moms what their diets are like, at least 85 of them will look at you and cringe. Unfortunately, there’s a tendency to just eat what you can, when you can. Even if you are on the go you need to make a conscious effort to eat well. When you eat nutritious foods, you are providing your body with the energy it needs to keep up with your kids and cope with the stress you encounter every day.
Create a support system. Teaming up with other moms makes a great support system. Even if you can’t get together every couple weeks, it is nice to know that you have someone you can call who won’t question your abilities but will just listen and empathize. All mothers feel the stress that comes with the job, so make sure to surround yourself with other moms that will be happy to listen to you when you need a shoulder to lean on; and be sure to return the favor!
Make time for yourself. As a mom, you may forget that you’re important too! This is why you need to make time for yourself every day. You may think that there is no time, but there is if you get help or if you sneak in some relaxation after the kids go to bed or before they get up. Give yourself a manicure or pedicure, drink that cup of tea slowly, read a book, take a long bath, or get a massage. Your relaxation time doesn’t have to be extravagant, but it needs to be there. Even 15 minutes every day can make all the difference!

Stress Tips for Single Moms

Being a single parent may be common today, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Many single moms are experiencing dangerous levels of stress, and they don’t see any way around it.
Chronic stress is harmful to your body, mind and spirit. As a parent, you need to find positive ways to deal with the stress so you can be healthy for both your children and yourself.
With a little bit of planning, help, and effort, you can juggle being both the parent and provider of your family.
Here are some tips to help you combat the everyday stresses of being a single mom:
1. Plan ahead.
 The best thing you can do when you’re a single mom is to plan ahead. You’ll find that the simple things in life that often cause the most stress can be managed or outright eliminated when you plan ahead.
 Prepare meals in advance and freeze them until you’re ready to use them.
 Have everyone put out their clothes the night before and their shoes by the front door so getting the day started will be a breeze.
2. Involve the kids.
You can’t do everything by yourself, so get your kids involved in getting things done. Any help that your kids are able to contribute will save you a lot of time and stress each day, plus it’s teaching them the importance of responsibility and contributing to the family.
 Teach them age-appropriate tasks like cleaning their room, doing laundry, making the grocery list, planning meals, cooking, taking out the trash, vacuuming, cleaning the bathrooms, and so on.
3. Know your limits.
When a friend, co-worker, or family member asks something of you that you know you can’t do, say no. It may not make the other person happy, but knowing your limits can help you from being overworked unnecessarily.
 If you don’t respect your time, who else will?
4. Create a support system.
When you have people that you can turn to, you’ll be able to release stress in a positive way. When you need a bit of reinforcement, it helps to know you can pick up the phone and call in backup!
 Your support system might consist of family members and friends who are willing to listen to you vent or even help you around the house.
5. Make time for yourself.
Schedule at least 10 to 15 minutes just for you into each day. This time can even be for something simple, like painting your fingernails, taking a hot bath, or reading for pleasure.
 Your alone time will refresh and revive you!
These are all very simple, yet effective, ways to deal with the stress of being a single parent. These tips won’t do away with stress altogether, but they’ll help you manage it in a way that will allow you to get things done and enjoy your life and kids.
Your kids will only be small for a short time, and you don’t want to waste these years in a stressed out daze. Instead, take advantage of the here and now by incorporating these stress management tips into your life. It’s easier than you think!

Niji No Hashi Dojo- Martial Arts, Cary, Morrisville, NC

10 Reasons for Low Self-Esteem

It’s time to take a good, long look at yourself.

Martial arts Cary Success is walking from failure to failure

Although it might be scary or even a bit disappointing, the sooner you do it, the quicker you’ll be able to get yourself back on track.

Do you experience the ill effects of low self-esteem and wonder about the source of your feelings of inadequacy? There are numerous potential sources of low self-esteem. It has been said that we spend the last 60 years of life recovering from the first 18. In many cases, the first 18 years of life give our self-esteem a beating. Adults aren’t immune from self-esteem issues either.

Increasing your self-esteem will enrich your life in countless ways. Your social life, finances, and happiness can all grow.

Determine the cause of your self-esteem challenges:

1. Peers. This is especially true during the school-age years, but can apply to adults as well. It’s natural to want to be respected and liked by one’s peers. Bullying, teasing, and other social-related issues can result in a loss of self-esteem.

2. Family. Some parents just aren’t nice people. Unsupportive, critical parents or other family members can harm a child’s self-esteem. This can be then be carried into adulthood. If your parents were less than spectacular, remember that you’re not alone.

3. Previous mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes, but some people forgive themselves more easily than others. The past is over. Look forward to new experiences.

4. Negative recurring thoughts. Negative thought patterns over years and decades can create a negative self-image. That’s why it’s so important to say positive things to yourself. Avoid underestimating the power of your thoughts.

5. Failure. Whether you failed to win the big game or land the big client, any perceived failure can result in a loss of confidence and self-esteem. Reframe how you view failure. Learn from your undesirable results. Only get upset with yourself if you continue to fail in the same manner. Change your approach if it isn’t working.

6. Unreasonable goals. Goals that are too big lead to failure. Ensure that your goals are challenging, but within reason for you. Getting too carried away increases the likelihood of a negative outcome and poor self-esteem.

7. Body Image. Society judges people based on appearances. You might be doing the same to yourself. Strive to move your body toward a healthy ideal, but accept that everyone is shaped differently and change can take time. Females are more likely to suffer from body image issues, but males can also face challenges.

8. Trauma. Trauma can take many forms: sexual, physical, or emotional. Any of these can result in low self-esteem. If you’re suffering from the results of traumatic experiences, getting professional help can be a wise decision.

9. Poor academic performance. School has a social component, but it’s supposed to be about the academics. Poor grades can be viewed as failing the purpose of attending school in the first place. Ensure that your child has the academic support they need to be successful.

10. Media. Media puts forth images of success and beauty that are out of reach for the average person. It doesn’t help that many of those images are manufactured and inaccurate. Holding yourself to an unreasonable standard causes you to feel bad about yourself. If you must compare yourself to someone, use a reasonable frame of reference.

Low self-esteem is a common issue. Understanding the cause of your low opinion of yourself can help to determine the solution. Everyone deals with low self-esteem days. But suffering from low self-esteem over a long period of time can lead to depression. Examine your past and find the source of your negative self-image.

Develop a plan for changing your feelings about yourself. Focus on the positive and let go of the past.

Niji No Hashi Dojo- Martial Arts, Cary, Morrisville, NC

How to Encourage Your Kids to Tell the Truth

You have the awesome power to build your child’s character.
Instilling honesty in your child.

Niji No Hashi Dojo- Martial Arts, Cary, Morrisville, NC,Kids-to-Tell-the-Truth

Do you struggle with getting your youngsters to tell the truth? It can be baffling to know what to do when your child is making up a story and sticking to it. Try these strategies to encourage your kids to level with you.

Strategies To Use At Every Age

1. Provide a good role model. The most important thing you can do is to demonstrate the importance of honesty in your own daily activities. Pay the full ticket price for kids who look small for their age. Resist making excuses when you get a parking ticket.

2. Identify the underlying causes. Kids may lie for many reasons. Often, they’re trying to avoid being punished. They may also be afraid of disappointing you. Or they may even be trying to conceal unpleasant facts from themselves! When you know what your child is feeling, you’re better positioned to respond appropriately.

3. Reward truthfulness. Let your kids know that honesty pays. Even if they accidentally break a neighbor’s window when they’re playing softball, praise them for coming clean about it.

4. Impose reasonable consequences. Kids are more likely to cover things up if they’re unsure what will happen to them or if they fear punishment. Try to be consistent with how you discipline them. You set the rules for your own household, but it may be helpful to survey what other parents do in the same circumstances.

5. Talk about values. Begin early with discussing values with your kids. Talk about the benefits of being honest and treating people well. Use examples from everyday life or the daily news to illustrate your points.

6. Remain calm. Your kids will likely be more attentive if you keep your emotions in check. It can be distressing to find out your child deceived you, but focus on resolving the conflict.

7. Avoid show downs. Make it as easy as possible for your kids to be honest. If you already know they told a fib, ask them how you can work together to improve the situation instead of putting them on the spot to elicit a confession.

8. Assume innocence. Some studies claim that people lie three times a day or more. Still, that means we’re telling the truth most of the time. Give your kids the benefit of the doubt to preserve trust and harmony.

9. Seek professional help. If you’re concerned that your child shows destructive patterns of deception, consider professional counseling to learn more effective ways to interact.

Strategies To Use At Specific Stages

1. Wait until kids know fact from fiction. Most kids are unable to understand the distinction between telling the truth and telling a lie until they are about 5 years old. You can start training them in the right direction, but punishment is meaningless when it’s premature.

2. Indulge fantasies. Imaginary friends are part of growing up. As long as your children seem happy and comfortable with real people, encourage their sense of play.

3. Recognize your child’s growing independence. As they enter the tween years, kids are likely to begin keeping more secrets. Keep the lines of communication open, but respect their growing need for autonomy.

4. Enforce limits with teens. On the threshold of adulthood, teens face many decisions that could determine their future. Set clear rules for telling the whole truth about driving, drinking and other priority subjects.
Most people lie from time to time, including kids. Setting a good example, discussing values, and rewarding honesty are the most effective ways to encourage.

 

Niji No Hashi Dojo- Martial Arts, Cary, Morrisville, NC

Meditation Inspired

4 Meditations
Inspired by Elevators

Niji No Hashi Dojo Martial Arts Cary, Morrisville, N.C-Meditation-Inspired-by-Elevators

Maybe Superman can leap tall buildings in a single bound, but most humans need a little help to reach the top floors.

Elevators help us make our way around shopping malls, parking garages, hotels, and office complexes.


Similarly, meditation can smooth our path in life. Take a few minutes to explore these reflections inspired by elevators.



Meditations on Heading Up or Down:

You’ve probably heard the saying that it’s impossible to stand still. You’re either making progress or you’re backsliding. There’s a reason why the elevator alarm goes off if you just sit there in the lobby.

1. Pick a priority. Take one area of your life where you want to make a change. Maybe it’s your parenting style or a health issue.

2. Envision your future. Imagine where you’d like to be in a month or 5 years from now. Think short and long term.

3. Write down a plan. Develop a concrete strategy to support your new resolution. Put it down on paper or carry it around in an app on your phone. Look at it when you need a reminder or want to evaluate your performance.

Meditations on Taking Control:

Those elevator buttons that claim to close the doors are usually fake. Scientists and interior decorators have discovered that humans feel happier when they have a sense of control.

1. Examine your concerns. What is currently causing anxiety in your life? Do you find yourself distracted thinking about car payments or your child’s report card?

2. Assess your needs. Outline what you require to feel calm and empowered. Reducing your monthly expenses or increasing your skills could give you more security.

3. Soothe yourself. Take time out to relax and restore. Regular breaks make you more centered and productive. Stop for a cup of tea or spend an hour working on your hobby. Dissolve stress with a warm bath or a few laps in the pool.

Meditations on Elevator Pitches:

Are you ready to make a positive impression on a potential employer or a new friend if you’re both headed to the same floor? Work on your brand.

1. Identify your values. Figure out what’s important to you. Shorten your to do list if you need to free up more hours for the activities that you find meaningful and nurturing.

2. Inventory your strengths. Understand what you have to contribute to the world. Ask yourself what you’re good at and what you like to do. Research careers that would allow you to draw on your signature strengths.

3. State your mission. Pull your thoughts together into a compelling brief summary of who you are and what you do. Revisit the statement every 6 months to see if it’s still accurate.

Meditations on Inactivity:

The downside to elevators is that they sometimes make us less active if we avoid using the stairs for short trips. Try staying on your feet and walking around for this practice.

1. Burn more calories. Look for ways to work more physical activity into your daily routine, and make your exercise sessions more consistent. Give your kitchen floor a good scrubbing instead of the usual quick mopping. Sign up for a dance class or buy a treadmill.

2. Shrink your waist. Abdominal fat can be especially harmful to your health. Lose excess weight and do exercises that target your core.

3. Build your muscles. Muscles burn more calories than fat even when you’re at rest. Train for strength with weight lifting and sprinting.
Remember that meditation and elevators are both uplifting experiences. Even a few minutes on your cushion or in an elevator can make a dramatic difference in helping you reach your destination.

Niji No Hashi Dojo Martial Arts Cary, Morrisville, N.C